The rhythm of everyday life

Shopping for drapes and curtains
I am so blessed to have an Italian friend who is willing to help me shop for window coverings. It is a daunting task in a house with 12 windows and 4 french doors, and with precious little time to shop, and even less time to consider making them myself, or even to install the rods myself. So I determined to just buy ready-made drapes or get some made and installed and be done with it.

Now this may seem extravagant to some of you (and in other circumstances it would seem so for me too) but at this moment in time, it is the only thing that makes sense. I am so glad to have my friend who can help guide me to reputable people, help translate and explain the options I have, and then she also has excellent taste and a good eye for design so I am in good hands.

I have now selected the drapes for the two living rooms downstairs; I am still mulling over the options for the bedrooms upstairs. The shop where we went is owned by someone that my friend knows. The wife runs this shop with the fabrics for the drapes, and other assorted household soft goods. Her husband runs a warehouse showroom with the rods and other drapery hardware that primarily sells to retailers. Because of my large purchase and the friendship with my friends, I got a good price, really nice fabric and a custom design. Another one of those "first and last time" experiences for me having custom made drapes

Den area

Living Room

The Spring Garden
With the advent of nice weather, we are busy putting out flowers and vegetables in our large garden. We have yet to locate the full service greenhouse (like a Flower World or even Lowes) as it seems that Italy is geared more toward the smaller places specializing in certain things. We have the Alberoso which specializes in trees and large shrubs but doesn't have bedding plants of seedlings of any kind. Then the grocery stores have lots of flowers that are bigger than bedding plants but not yet full size so we have been getting those a few at a time to fill up our balcony railing baskets.

Flowers in the Winter Garden

Then for gardening tools and sacks of manure and potting soil, we are going to a place called Happy Casa which is kind of like a Dollar Store and Wal Mart combination. A friend at work brought me a few Eggplants that are already over a foot tall. We got tomato and pepper plants at another place a friend took Johnnie. So here, there and everywhere we are finding things.

We also started some seeds of our own but probably too late for a very good crop. Here the seedlings should be transplanted outdoors in February for the cool crops like broccoli,
cauliflower and leafy vegetables. Our seeds are just now coming up and are still a couple weeks away from moving to the garden so, there is always next year! We also might try a Fall crop when we get back from the US in late August as that will be the time for the cool crops again.

The villa already has some beautiful roses planted in the beds around the house. All they need is some TLC. When the weeds were removed and they got a little sun, they really came back.

Front porch

Upper story balcony railing

Johnnie also loves putting flowers along the porch and the balcony. This is very Italian having the flowers trailing from the balconies. Gernamiums are the most popular, probably because they tolerate the hot, dry weather. It is not as hot here as in other parts, but they also seem to tolerate the cool evenings as well.

I also have my herbs sitting on the ledge of the porch and our seedlings are there as well.

Having the Neighbors to lunch

Plans changed again and we were unable to go on the bus trip to the Agri-turismo. It turned out to be Saturday, not Sunday, and we already had a full day planned for Saturday but, the neighbors were able to come to Sunday lunch.

So we debated what to prepare: traditional American comfort food (meat loaf, mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans), or, Sour Cream Chicken Enchiladas. Hm.

So we opted for a Mexican meal: Sour Cream Chicken Enchiladas, Ensalada de Nopalitos, Refried Beans, Red Rice and Sangria. Johnnie made Molten Lava Cake for dessert.

It turned out good, even though I had to substitute several ingredients that I cannot find in Italy. I used Gouda instead of Cheddar Cheese, Mascarpone Cheese with lemon juice and a bit of salt added instead of sour cream, flour tortillas instead of corn, and Formaggio Caciotta with pepperoni instead of Chihuahua cheese. The refried beans I made from scratch from dried pinto beans a friend from the US brought me, and the nopales were from a jar.

Do you know what was the favorite of our Italian friends? The refried beans! They had seconds and thirds. This was the first time I made it from dried beans, and I was pleased that it turned out so good. I may never use canned refried beans again.

The entire afternoon was very enjoyable and we talked about many things, including our children, our gardens, and plans for the summer. It was a typical Italian mid-day meal, long, slow, and savoring life in the moment. In the company of these lovely people, language was not a barrier. We communicated beautifully and when there was a point when we couldn't find the right words, we got out the Italian-English dictionary.

 Here are a couple of my recipes I will share.

Sour Cream Chicken Enchiladas (recipe from Rancho Encantado, Santa Fe, New Mexico)
3 1/2 c. sour cream (I used Mascarpone thinned with the juice of a lemon and a little bit of salt)
3 5 oz. cans boned chicken (2 cups)
2 4 oz. cans mushrooms, stems and pieces, drained (I used fresh mushrooms)
1 4 oz. can green chiles, chopped
1/3 c. onion flakes (I used fresh onion, diced about 1/2 cup)
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
1 tsp. chili powder
1/2 tsp. garlic powder
1/3 lb. cheddar cheese, grated (I used Gouda)
12 corn tortillas (I used 8 8 inch flour tortillas)
In a 13 x 9" pan spread 1 cup sour cream, set aside. In a 2 qt. saucepan with fork flake chicken; add 1/2 cup sour cream, mushrooms, chiles, onion flakes, chili powder, salt, garlic powder and pepper. (Since I used fresh mushrooms and onion, I sautéed them first in a skillet with a little olive oil, then added to the chicken mixture). Cook over low heat until heated through. Preheat oven to 450 degrees F. In a skillet over medium heat, in 1/2 inch hot oil, fry tortilla, a few seconds on each side until it softens. ( I warmed the flour tortillas in the microwave which makes them soft enough to roll without frying in oil). For enchiladas along center of tortillas, spread 1/4 cup chicken mix. Fold sides of tortillas over filling and place seam side down. Repeat, making 11 more. Spread with remaining sour cream, then sprinkle with cheese. Bake 8 min. or until cheese melts.


Ensalada de Nopalitos - Serves 6

1/2 cup chopped onion
3 Tb. cider vinegar
2 Tb. lime juice
1/2 tsp. salt
Combine these, cover and let stand 1 hr. (I added a small chopped zucchini to this mixture to punch up the veggies).

2 lbs. uncooked nopales
1 large onion, unpeeled and cup up
1 head garlic, unpeeled and halved
3 cups water
3 Tb. sea salt
1 cup fresh cilantro sprigs
Wearing gloves, use a vegetables peeler to remove the thorns from the no pales. Cut nopales into bite sized strips. In a large saucepan bring 2 cups water and 3 Tb. salt to boiling. Add the unpeeled onion, garlic cilantro sprigs and nopales. Return to boiling, reduce heat. Cook uncovered for 10 min. stirring occasionally. Drain off liquid. Discard onion, garlic and cilantro sprigs. Return nopal strips to pan. Add the remaining 1 cup water. Bring to boiling, reduce heat. Simmer uncovered 5 min. or until tender. Drain. Rinse with cold water. Cool completely.
(I used nopales from a jar, simply drain and rinse).

8 oz. Chihuahua cheese, cubed (I used the Formaggio Caciotta with pepperoni)
1 tomato, seeded and coarsely chopped
1/4 cup olive oil
1/4 cup snipped fresh cilantro
3 Tb. snipped fresh oregano
In a large bowl combine onion mixture, cheese, tomato, oil, snipped cilantro and oregano. Add nopales, toss to coat. Serve with avocado slices.

Coffee with our Italian neighbors

If you have been following the blog, then you will remember back in February when we first moved into the villa, and immediately got snowed in, our neighbors behind us invited us to a dinner party the first weekend we were here. It was a great time and we helped celebrate the birthday of the Signora. It was not long after that we left in a hurry for the US and really didn't get to say good bye or explain to them why we were leaving or where we were going. I asked our bi-lingual DSP to give a message to my landlady and asked if she would let them know.

Since we returned, we have waved a few times but haven't really talked with them. So yesterday we baked some zucchini bread and today we took it over to them with a note explaining what happened to us. I asked an Italian friend to help me write the note so it would be a really clear explanation, vs. my broken Italian which could miscommunicate (or google translate which sometimes garbles things too).

We had a nice visit -- she speaks some English, my broken Italian, lots of smiles and charades--all made for a fun time. She gave Johnnie a lesson on making Italian coffee while her husband toured me through his cactus and succulent garden. He is quite the gardener and has a beautiful yard.

They were glad to understand where we had gone. Apparently the landlady never told them so they were wondering, and were worried about us. Such nice people!

We invited them to lunch at our villa on Sunday but it turns out they have plans to take a bus trip with their garden club to visit an Agri-turismo near here. So, instead, we are going on the bus trip with them this Sunday. The Agri-turismo has many trees and flowers and then we will all have lunch there together. This will be another exciting adventure for us.

Stay tuned for the next installment of Touring the Agri-turismo!

More Blessings and More Time of Reflection

Christ the Lord is risen today! Alleluia!

Hearing the familiar tune of one of my most favorite hymns, and being in worship service this morning is one of the best experiences!

Some thoughts that come to mind:

The gift of hospitality
Not everyone has the gift of hospitality. It is more than just inviting guests into your home. I think that is why it is described in scripture as a gift; some people have a special ability to really make people feel welcome and comfortable and "at home". Beyond just that, I think it also has to do with putting yourself in someone else's shoes, so to speak, and figuring out what would bless them. I also am beginning to understand the gift of hospitality extends to strangers as well, not just people you know. We know a special couple that extended huge hospitality to us while I was recuperating from the pneumonia by letting us stay at their house several weeks. Their hospitality is such that they have a wing of their home reserved  for missionaries, and others that the Lord sends their way. Now that is hospitality!

Staying with friends in Everett - we do wish they would have arranged a little warmer weather!

Romans 12:13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

I am praying that the Lord will increase my awareness of the meaning of true Biblical hospitality and my talents in that direction. It may not be my most strong calling but I always want to make people feel welcome and like they can call me anytime and say "hey, can I come spend some time with you?".

The gift of helps
Now this is one of those spiritual gifts that has always baffled me a bit. It seems so obvious we should all be helpful to each other and to strangers. God's Word gives us lots of instructions about sharing the good news, visiting the sick and those in prison, taking care of widows and orphans, and aren't those all "helps"? So why does the scripture specifically mention Helps as a spiritual gift and how is that different from what the Lord expects of all his followers acting out their faith?

1 Cor. 12:28 And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. 


Romans 12:6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your^[a] faith; ⁷ if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; ⁸ if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead,^[b] do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.


We know some people that are very gifted in the area of Helps. These people just work in such a quiet, supportive way, without many people noticing, just continuing to do one act of kindness after another. We have such friends that have given us rides, kept us company when we were lonely, gone with us to appointments and to run errands when we need support, make phone calls for us, stop by for a chat, check in on us to see how we are doing, and so many other acts of Helps that it really is hard to even describe all of them.We had several invitations to stay with friends and other invitations for meals together, people who really reach and live out their faith through action.


Thank you Lord for gifting our friends with Helps, and for bringing them in to our lives at a time when we so needed help. I ask your continued blessing on them as they use their gifts serving others.


Blessing of special friends come for a visit 
What a special occasion that friends come to see us thousands of miles away. We were so excited to have them and to be able to "show off" a little bit of our new home and country that adopted us (or we adopted it). The best part is when we all got the giggles driving around half lost (not totally lost) down around Ercolano, driving up roads that dead ended and we had to back down, honking back at the irate Italians who honked at us, and then, we found this really neat little restaurant and had a great meal there together. All this was pretty much in the pouring rain!

Tres amiche before departure

Anticipation of new growth and new beginnings in Spring
Sunshine, rain, and time to plant flowers and veggies and think about barbecues and long walks. Johnnie woke up to strange sounds outside the house the other day that turned out to be some sheep herder with his flock across the road grazing the tender grass.

Johnnie is in the country now! Our neighbor grazing his sheep across the road

Challenges of living in a new culture
We are entering a new phase of challenges being in our own home and having much more square footage to clean and decorate and organize and occupy. We also need to find new places for worship, shopping, hair salon, dry cleaning, post office, doctor's office, pharmacy, garden shop, etc. These things take time but are an important part of connecting with the community.

Major cultural accomplishments this week:
*We went to Ikea and managed to order two closets and some bookcases to be delivered to the house. This might sound like a small thing but, with the language barrier, it felt like a major achievement!
*Found two new restaurants in Mercogliano, the post office, and two garden centers.
*Found out how to pay our internet and sky tv bills - at the tabacci shop! Then setup accounts online in Italian, so we could see when the bill comes due and print it off!
*Got all my expense reports completed and submitted, and, filed the insurance claim form for the stuff damaged in the move
*Johnnie had his first tutored language lesson and that was a bust. Oh well, we'll try again.

Blessings amidst difficult times

The last several months have been a challenge for us, difficult at times, and a few times we were ready to just give up. I have shed several tears in the past weeks and asked the Lord, "What are you doing? Why?"


My study of the Holy Bible and the teaching of my Christian faith remind me that "... we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28)


So as I reflect now, back on the past 6 weeks or so, I am able to see more clearly the blessings and good things that came out of this experience. I record in my personal journal my thoughts along the way. I am drawing from that to list here a summary of the good things.

Blessing of Unexpected precious family time 

We were not planning on returning to the US until August, so it was great to have time with my sister and brother in law, even though for a sad reason. We ended up being at their house 3 weeks, which really was the longest time we have ever spent together. There was a lot of work during that time, going back and forth to my brother’s house, taking care of that business and planning the Memorial, but, it was time for a lot of good conversation.

Blessing of English-speaking medical help

There are many good doctors in Italy but the language barrier is always an issue, as well as being a struggle just trying to figure out where to go and how to negotiate through the system. So when I was not feeling great when we left Italy, and I was starting to get really sick about 5 days before the Memorial, my sister took me to ER on a Friday night. I agreed to go at both her’s and Johnnie’s urging. Sure enough the chest X-ray showed pneumonia. At least there was a name for how crummy I felt. Three hours later we returned home loaded down with medication. I am thankful for good medical care.

Blessing of learning more about my brother

Going through his personal affects, sorting out items for the Memorial, trying to figure out who to notify among his friends that are not in the area, and where he kept all his papers and accounts you get to know quite a bit about a person. Even though we were pretty close in recent years, there are sides to him I didn’t know before.

Joel and George with they new "baby" - espresso machine

One surprising thing was the soft spot he had in his heart for family memorabilia. Mom had saved his school papers and plays he was in, music he wrote, newspaper articles, old photos and yearbooks, etc. He always said he didn’t care about that stuff and laughed at what  a packrat I am when it comes to that stuff. So weren’t we surprised to find two large underbed boxes stuffed with memorabilia of the younger years.

We also found out how many young people he mentored over the years and how much admired he was for his help and his talents. So many people heard of the Memorial through the word of mouth, and we ended up with a full house. That was the testimony to the kind of impact he had. I know there will not be that many people at my Memorial!

Blessing of time for meditation and prayer

In total I was down for about 3 weeks in total, some days in the beginning in bed most of the day. As I improved some, I sat in the living room but still didn’t feel like reading, or sewing or doing much of anything. So I used that time for thinking, and for prayer. I can honestly say it was a huge blessing to be in prayer on and off all day long without interruption or my mind wandering.

Blessing of time with friends in Everett

During my three week convalescence in Everett, we were able to spend time with lots of our good friends and church family in Everett. Johnnie had several breakfasts and lunches with his fishing buddy. I connected with several girlfriends and got together with the former Boeing group several times. These were wonderful and encouraging times!

Dinner at Giorgio's

Lunch at Applebees

Blessing of time with our Monday night Bible Study Group

What a special group of people these are! We were amazingly blessed by getting to attend 3 Bible Studies! The first night they spent time praying just for us. The fellowship was a tremendous boost for us spiritually since we have not yet connected with a group in Italy.

Blessing of worship with our MVCC Church family

We were able to attend a Sunday morning worship service and praise the Lord together with them. We collected lots of hugs and encouragement. Also speaking that day was a visiting missionary from Russia. Many of the challenges he described about going to Russia to live are the same things we are finding in Italy. 

Blessing of the Women’s Friendship Tea

I was able to attend the annual tea with the women of MVCC, friends and neighbors. One hundred women came together and had brunch and heard the story of one of our women and the how she has gone through tremendous spiritual growth in the past 7 years. That was very encouraging!

Jenny, Kristine, Elaine at the Women's Tea

Blessing of meeting some new friends

During the course of cleaning out my brother’s house and planning the Memorial we met some very special people that were friends to my brother for many years and will be friends to us as well, in the years to come.

Blessing of kindness from strangers

One person who is a friend of a friend, volunteered to do a video recording of the Memorial. She will not accept any money for doing it, only asked that we make a donation to the fund of Amina Bowman, 9 year old girl in Bremerton who was accidently shot in school. 

Blessing of kindness from Italian friends

Two of our new friends in Italy emailed us regularly to see how we are doing and when we are coming back. How precious is that! Many expats come and complete their two year assignment without ever making any Italian friends, so we are already hugely blessed! Our landlady at the villa had her maid come and do a walk through of our villa (at our request) to make sure everything was ok. She cleaned out the refrigerator of stinky stuff since we left in a hurry and had not done that. There was a power outage as well while we were gone, so I can just imagine what it would have been like to arrive home to that mess, if she had not this kindness for us. She also turned down our furnace which we had left on as well.

Blessing of time spent on the family history

With lots of extra time on my hands, I was able to spend hours working on the family history and family tree. Between the documents we found in my brother’s things, some new photos and materials our cousin sent, and my own research on line, we made good progress. I also connected with several other people that research our family name and started sharing information with them. We started a tree for Johnnie’s family also.


Now that we are back in Italy and life is returning to "normal" (whatever that is!) I have gained a new appreciation for an easy rhythm of daily activities that is full of the joy of everyday living. I wouldn't trade the difficult or challenging times because that is what makes us grow and gives us keen appreciation for the things in life we often overlook. But it is really nice to be home!

Time of Reflection

Some of these thoughts I put in my eulogy for my brother. As I mull them over, I am refining my thoughts a bit and adding some things that occur to me in this process.

Where we are now
We are staying with some good friends in Everett for a few days until I am well enough to travel. After 3 weeks at my sister's house, it was time to give them some peace and let them resume their normal life, so we headed out yesterday afternoon.

I am still recovering from pneumonia and on a 2nd round of antibiotics. I hope by the follow up next week, I am released to travel. I am doing better though still coughing and sounding nasty, and still very tired, so from my perspective, I need a few more days to rest up for the arduous trip. The best flights available still make it about a 20 hr. trip door-to-door, so that is beyond me at present.

The Memorial for my Brother
It was a nice service, went an hour longer than we planned but lots of people spoke and several shared musical numbers. That was fitting since his adult passion in life was always in the theatre and music area, even if he made his money other ways.

It is good for us to remember him in the many different and positive ways he impacted so many lives. I was most touched by the young people and his friends from Jr. High and High School that said what an encourager he was to them. He always pushed people to stretch themselves and dream beyond their circumstances.

George Lance Gilbert with Taita

We found a good home for Taita and his new owner even brought us photos to the Memorial to show us how happy Taita is. I know George would be happy too.

Lessons Learned

First, don’t lose those important connections you make during your life from neglect or because you are “too busy”. Nurture those friendships. Don’t worry about what other people will think of you or what a success (or not) you are in life. True friends don’t care if you are working at McDonalds; they don’t care what you look like or what kind of car you drive.

Second, define success in your life by the relationships you have, not by your accomplishments. It's all about the people! When we work so hard to accomplish something in our work, we are prone to sacrifice health, family, relationships, and all else. This is such a problem of the American culture. I am as prone to this tendency as my brother was; we jump in to our work with whole-hearted involvement but we can let it overwhelm us and crowd out the most important things in life. I feel this is a huge life lesson for me right now. 

Third, when you get into hard times, don't be afraid to let people know when you need help. Oh I know for most of us, pride gets in the way. Also, we don't want to be a burden or bother to our family and friends. But, when it reaches a point that you really need help, you need to be very clear and shout out to your people so they don't miss the message. I was shocked to see how difficult my brother's situation had become; maybe I should have been better at reading the signs and listening to what wasn't being said. I know I could have been more help than I was. It would not have changed the number of his days, but it could have made the quality of the life before that better.

Finally, say "I love you" to the people around you. Express your appreciation, your admiration and give hugs freely. I love the fact that Italians are so expressive. They hug, they kiss, they link arms when they walk, they focus on each other with total attention when they talk, like there is nothing else in the world but the two of you. We need to be deliberate about this; don’t postpone it, or wait for the “right moment”. Just say I love you!

Keeping Perspective

Lord what are you doing now?
I am having trouble writing this blog because I feel at a total loss for words. It still doesn't feel real just yet that my brother is gone -- passed away suddenly on 2/16/2012 of a heart attack at age 51. I am in WA now, after a quick packing and flight over. My sister and I and our ever-patient, ever-supportive husbands are at our sides, removing personal belongings from his house, making arrangement for the cat, the memorial, etc.

Three weeks ago we were dealing with moving, electrical and plumbing problems at the villa, and hosting my daughter for a visit to Italy. That seemed like the all-consuming issues of the day, and all of a sudden, our world turns upside down and all that stuff seems insignificant.

Lord, with all we have been through with my brother, I don't understand why you took him now? He missed seeing and understanding how many people love him, how important he was to so many people, what a huge contribution he made to the music and fine arts community in Bremerton and Silverdale, and how many young people he mentored that just totally admire his talent and skill, and most importantly, he missed the key thing which was none of those people cared whether he was "successful" at the coffee shop business or not; that doesn't matter to any of his friends and family, only to him was it so important to be "successful".